Self Improvement » Self Esteem

Developing Self Esteem On The Offspring

icamm — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 10:30:06 +0000

Our offsprings’ self esteem is their best line of defense against the harsh world we have today. That is why, early on in their lives, we, as parents, should ensure that we build their concept of independence and self confidence, to make sure that they survive and thrive when they get older. Having our offspring hang on to every word we say and mimic every move we make is cute when they’re three years old.

However, when they turn ten and they’re still copying us and depending on every bit of our opinions to get by in life, it’s not really healthy anymore. Our children will have to learn at some point to stand on their own two feet, otherwise, they will be left behind.

Child psychologists say that keeping too close watches on the offspring is detrimental in the long run because it hampers the child’s ability to develop into his own unique self. Personalities that are stifled because of overbearing and overprotective parents tend to burst out later in their adult life and lead to personality disorders. Surely you don’t want your child to be such a person. Therefore, it is important that you build your offpsring’s self esteem and teach him the value of free thinking as early as you can.

Now, this doesn’t mean you have to breed destabilizers and rebels. While you need to let go of your offspring and let him make mistakes on his own, you will still need to watch from the sidelines to make sure that he doesn’t stray from his chosen path.

Allow the kid to flourish and grow at his own pace and time. The biggest mistake you can do is to allow him, at first, to choose his path and then make the rest of the decisions and moves for him after. Your child has a mind of his own. He is not your puppet.

Developing self esteem on the offspring is difficult at first, since, as parents, you only want the best for your kid and want to protect him from any kind of disappointment or harm. However, you must acknowledge that failure and pain are inevitable. At some point in our children’s lives, they will experience pain : and the best thing we can do to prepare them for these kinds of situations is to instill in them the confidence and belief than they can rise above challenges and pick themselves up and try again if they fall.

Our children need to believe that they can achieve things on their own. For instance, when a child messes up the books on the shelf, let him fix the mess by himself and don’t pick up after him. Teach him that it is his responsibility to put the books back because it was him who made them fall in the first place. Of course, assist him if the task is too huge. However, you must make him believe that he had done everything on his own all along.

Parents who breed kids who are too dependent on them often end up with spoiled brats : who are actually a lot more difficult to tame when they get older. What we want as parents are offspring who have minds of their own and are able to face any challenge without buckling at the sight of difficulty. Our children’s self esteem is one of the most powerful tools they can use in the fight of life. It is our duty as parents to instill this trait in them.

Building Self Esteem

icamm — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 12:00:05 +0000

When children first get exposed to a group setting, like that of pre-school or a play area where there are lots of other kids, it won’t be a surprise if they suddenly buckle down and turn shy. Often you, as a parent, will have to coerce the child to mingle. What parent would want a social wallflower for a child, right?

A lot of parents encounter this problem of having to almost push their kids into a play group just so they would socialize. More often than not, this strategy ends not with a nod of agreement from the kid, but an afternoon of bawling.

If you’ve honed your child’s self esteem early on, socializing will not be a problem for him or her. In fact, if you’ve taught your kid not to be afraid of other kids and to believe that he or she can do many things and that taking risks are a part of life, seeing him minble, speak for himself, and make his own decisions will be part of your child-rearing achievements.

Most kids are hesitant to go out into the world and prefer to hide under their parents’ guidance. However, as they get older, this kind of attitude is not something you should encourage. Your kid has to learn to be independent at some point. You are assured that your kid will be fine if you arm him or her with self esteem.

How is self esteem built in children? Here are some tips.

a. Encourage him or her to get out of his or her comfort zone.

A kid that’s too sheltered all his life, that is, you’re always there to do things for him and make him stick strictly to a daily routine, then you can count on seeing him or her just stand in the corner and cry when something out of the routine happens. Give him or her variety. Expose him to new ideas and allow him to wander.

b. Realize that you can’t protect your child forever.

The only way for kids to effectively learn and adapt to life’s harsh realities is if we allow them to make mistakes. While we don’t want to see our kids get hurt and disappointed, failure is often necessary in order for them to learn how to cope. Mistakes are a natural part of life. No matter how hard you try to shield them from error, children will inevitably face the mat some point in their lives.

c. Leave him to his element.

Don’t force what you want on your child : he was not born to fulfill the dreams you weren’t able to reach. Let him develop into the person he is meant to be, with you just staying in the sidelines to guide him along the way. Accept that your child has his own identity. Let him grow and flourish at his own pace and at his own time.

The above are just a few of the things that you can do to boost your child’s self esteem. You have to first believe in your child’s ability to think for himself before you can convince him or her that he or she can do it. How high your kid’s self esteem can reach will depend on your encouragement.

Parenting is a difficult job and there is no single and clear-cut way to emerge victorious. However, you will already feel as if you have succeeded if your child is confident enough to face the world.

Self-Esteem Worksheets As Tools For Development

icamm — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 03:15:03 +0000

Both self-esteem and inferiority complex are not acquired through birth. These are developed through time. One’s experiences or interaction with society greatly shapes and determines this. Some are very fortunate to have been born to families who take pains to seek ways on how to develop self-esteem in their children while most tend to raise their children in the manner that they are raised which is, in most cases, tend to create inferiority complex rather than build self-esteem.

For instance, if a child comes to you with news about a failing grade, the normal reaction would be to raise your voice at them and say something like, “What? That’s what you get for being too lazy to study your lessons!”. Statements such as these tend to create self-doubts in a child. What we sometimes overlook is the fact that they already feel bad about having a bad grade, they do not need us to drive the point across any further.

Instead, it would be better to ask them what happened and how does the child feel about having low marks. And then ask them what they think they should do so they can get better grades next time.

With this kind of reaction, a parent also encourages the child to decide for themselves what to do and have a sense of control over their lives. These are of course, essential factors to build self-esteem on.

It would also help if we make a habit out of poiting out the good qualitites in people. Accentuating the positive will actually help people bring out that trait more often. There are various tools to help boost a person’s self-esteem. There are various reading materials available online or in bookstores.

It is always good to read up on books that empower people. There are also self-esteem tests available on the net. However, these mostly just give us snap shots of the entire picture. But knowing where we lack are effective tools to make ourselves better people. Self-esteem seminars are also rampant.

People who evaluate a person’s self-esteem do this through self-esteem worksheets. These are effectively a list of questionnaires where one will be asked to rank certain situations from one to five. One being that they strongly disagree to five being that they strongly agree. Some include essay portions where one will be asked to answer a set of questions mostly dealing with one’s self-perception.

Samples of self-esteem worksheets can be downloaded from the following sites:

www.lessonplanspage.com/OPESelf-EsteemLesson9.htm

www.ml.com/philanthropy/ipo/volunteer/pdf/level1worksheets15.pdf

www.ces.ncsu.edu/depts/fcs/smp9/parent_education/self_esteem.htm

www.selfesteemplus.com/self-esteem-worksheets.htm

www.edhelper.com/ReadingComprehension_29_105.html

acqol.deakin.edu.au/instruments/scale_details.php?id=

www.cloudnet.com/~edrbsass/affectiveeducation.html

www.dotherapy.com/GrpSE.htm

www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/docs/SE_Module%209_July%2005.pdf

www.mafaa.org/committees/early_awareness/Part3_Lesson_Plans.pdf

www.resources.theinspirationplace.com/directories/self-esteem/self-esteem84.php

www.mtstcil.org/skills/image-4.html

www.pecentral.org/lessonideas/health/selfesteemworksheet.html

www.lapublishing.com/detail.asp_Q_product_id_E_FFRM_A_Contents_E_TOC

www.iamaperson.com/ – 21k

www.ncdjjdp.org/gsm/selfesteem.html

www.ml.com/philanthropy/ipo/volunteer/pdf/level1answerkey15.pdf

www.amazon.com/Balancing-Individual-Organizational-Values-Tightrope/dp/0787957208 – 107k

www.selfesteemplus.com/low-self-esteem.htm – 19k

www.region.peel.on.ca/health/commhlth/selfest/selfimg3.htm

www.chalkface.com/_Exercises_to_Improve_Self-knowledge_and_Self-esteem_1_231.html

www.lifeskillstraining.com/uploads/media/ES%20Process%20Checklist%201.pdf

www.lifeskillstraining.com/uploads/media/ES%20Process%20Checklist%203.pdf

Just because we have not been blessed with perfect childhoods do not mean we are not entitled to success and happiness. As what Eleonor Roosevelt once said “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” Other people’s opinion of us depends on our opinion of ourselves.

If we feel hatred for ourselves, then it will be impossible for the world to love us back. Beginning to love ourselves more can be a long and tedious process but the happiness and contentment we reap once we start to achieve this will be all worth the effort. It does not take much to change the world, only people who are willing to be better individuals.

Enriching Lives Through Self-Esteem Tests

icamm — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 18:30:13 +0000

Self-esteem is really all about believing in your capacity as a human baing. You can never really reach your full potential unless you believe in yourself. A person who has high regards for the self are those who view life in a positive way. They are never ones who are prone to anger, instead they welcome each and every event as an oppurtunity to learn and develop as an individual.

It is very crucial that one learns to develop his or her self-esteem if he or she is to be truly happy. Indeed, contentment and happines go hand in hand and this has its basis on a good level of self-esteem. However, a high self-esteem should never be confused with egotism.

There is a difference. Having a high self-esteem means not only caring for the self which is mostly what egotism is all about, it is caring for others as well. Self-esteem is all about knowing and believing in one’s self enough to trust and start believing in others too. What follows is a nice poem that summarizes what self-esteem is all about.

RISE ABOVE THE CROWD

(Anonymous Author)

The world is full of people,

content to be what they are

Who never know the joy of success;

they lack the will to go that far.

Yet in this world there is a need,

for some to lead the rest

To rise above the average life,

by giving of their best.

Are you the one who dares,

to try when challenged by the task

To rise to heights you’ve never dreamed,

Or is that too much to ask?

This can be your year,

for great purpose to achieve

If you accept the challenge,

and in yourself believe.

Indeed, one can only go as far as where one’s belief in one’s self would carry them.

Although it is true that development of self-esteem starts from the ages one to five years old, any one from any age group can develop this. Self-esteem is not a natural talent. It is acquired and develop.

One cannot do this all by himself but it would need the cooperation of society. While one retains full control of his or her self-esteem development, the people that surround him or her would help develop his self-confidence. It just takes a difference in the way one perceives things to improve self-esteem.

There are so many ways to go about this. There are many reading materials in fact, that tackle self-esteem. The most popular is Jack Canfield’s Chicken Soup for the Soul. Most of Oprah episodes also tackle how to develop self-esteem, for wasn’t it her show that introduced self-esteem gurus such as Dr. Grey and Dr. Phil? Both are now renowned authors of popular self-help books.

Seminars are also being conducted. These usually lasts anywhere from one to three days. It may be a bit costly, but live interaction is usually the more effective road to development.

There are also self- esteem tests available on the net. Some sites offer free assessment, however, these would merely give you snap shots and not a thorough evaluations. However, given the idea of where you might be needing improvement could propel you to strive more to improve on these aspects. These sites include:

Queendom.com

Testcafe.com

Coaching to happiness.com

Psychtests

Wellnessnet

Selfesteem4women

Kaaj.com

Okcupid.com

More-selfesteem.com

www.expertrating.com/quizzes/Self-Esteem

www.anxietycentre.com/anxiety-tests/self-esteem

Self-Esteem Test To Know Yourself More

icamm — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 03:45:01 +0000

What do Albert Einstein, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, Helen Keller and all the other successful people like them have in common? They all believed in themselves. What do Charlie Manson, Marilyn Monroe and Karen Carpenter have in common? They thought little of themselves prompting them to give up on life.

Indeed, one’s success or lack thereof can be traced to self-esteem. In essence, self-esteem is an overall assesment of one’s worth or value. It can never be said enough that one’s success can only be measured by how much he or she believes in himself or herself.

Self-esteem is not acquired by birth like talents. It is crafted by people surrounding an individual. It is ideal for self-esteem to be developed from home. People from ages one to five are made to be impressionable therefore, it is important to start making children feel special, important and respected from an early age.

Decision making skills are also cultivated from childhood. When a child does something wrong, instead of blaming him or her for the deed, it is better to ask the child what made that wrong and ask them what they could do to correct it.

This not only builds their decision-making skills, but most importantly, it makes them feel trusted and imported. The more a person feels trusted to do something ,the better he or she will aim to carry out a task in the best way that they can. The more a good trait is recognized, the more a person strives to bring this out more often.

One can test self-esteem or lack thereof by checking if he or she has one or more of the following traits:

Group One

* feelings of being unloved.
* overly dependent, inability to make decisions
* extreme jealousy
* excessive worry
* fear of trying new activities (risk-taking)
* perfectionism
* inability to describe or even understand feelings
* frustration
* excessive anger
* need to over achieve
* poor school performance

Group Two

* solves (rather than avoids or denies) problems
* sees mistakes as learning experiences
* ability to trust people
* takes reasonable risks
* lives life independently
* understands and is able to express feelings and emotions in positive ways
* enjoys meeting new people, making new friends
* cooperative (easy to get along with)
* accepts and give compliments

Traits listed under group one are attitudes that, according to Gillian Butler and Tony Hope, authors of “Managing your Mind”, depict a person who lacks self-esteem while characteristics listed under Group Two are those that define a person who has a healthy level of self-esteem.

Even as development of self-esteem starts from childhood, it is never too late to rectify past mistakes. The first step comes from acknowledging what you lack and t hen working on these things. There are various ways to improve self-esteem. The net provides various sites to test self-esteem such as:

Queendom.com

Testcafe.com

Coaching to happiness.com

Psychtests

Wellnessnet

Selfesteem4women

Kaaj.com

Okcupid.com

More-selfesteem.com

These tests give glimpses or snap shots of where we need to improve on in relation to self-esteem development. A thorough evaluation can also be obtained from professionals. Thorough evaluations are specifically designed tests for individuals and mostly come with recommendations for improvement.

However, it is important to remember that self-esteem tests are merely tools to help you discover what you lack 80% of the work still depends on a person’s determination to change his or her life.

Self-Esteem Seminars

icamm — Thu, 15 May 2008 15:45:03 +0000

Self-esteem is the way in which a person views his or herself. A person with a healthy self-esteem has a positive outlook and believes in himself. A person who is lacking demonstrates anger and negativity. In fact, many people have written about the symptoms of lack of self-esteem Two of these people are Gillian Butler and Tony Hope, authors of Managing Your Mind, who listed the signs of low self-esteem as follows:

- feelings of being unloved
- overly dependent, inability to make decisions
- extreme jealousy
- excessive worry
- fear of trying new activities (risk-taking)
- perfectionism
- inability to describe or even understand feelings
- frustration
- excessive anger
- need to over achieve
- poor school performance
- highly critical of self and others
- continuously in poor health
- poor posture, slumping
- inability to look people in the eye
- drug, alcohol abuse, sexual promiscuity
- eating disorders
- self-mutilation

While it is important to develop self-esteem in childhood since a person is very impressionable from the ages one to five, self-esteem can be developed at any time or age. One just has to be patient and persevering. There are many ways to develop self-esteem. There are various reading materials on this subject, one of the most famous is Chicken Soup for the Soul by Jack Canfield. Incidentally, he also conducts self-esteem seminars.

Self-esteem seminars could take anywhere from one to three days and these are wonderful tools to help develop self-esteem. One can also opt to seek therapy. The key to developing self-esteem is first to recognize what you lack. Pinpoint areas that made you that way and let go. Only with letting go can the process of healing and moving on can truly begin.

Most societal problems today are borne out of a lack in self-esteem. While the most successful people first believed in themselves. Developing self-esteem can be a daunting task but with the right tools and determination, any one of any age can become better individuals.

It would probably surprise a lot of people how a healthy self-esteem could turn their lives around and provide for them success in whatever they choose to do.

Self-Assessment tests are available on the net, but for a thorough evaluation it would be best to seek professional help. Tests on the net usually just give glimpses or ideas of one’s personality strengths and weaknesses. On the other hand, it also lists some self-esteem seminars that one can opt to attend. Some popular seminars include:

Jack canfield (author Chicken Soup for the Soul)

Self-Esteem Optimization Seminar www.optimalthinking.com/Selfesteem

National Association for Self-esteem (NASE)

Self-Hel Energy Workshop (Dr. Doris Jeanette)

While other reading materials include:

“Measures of Self-Esteem.” Blascovich, Jim and Joseph Tomaka

“Measures of Personality and Social Psychological Attitudes” J.P. Robinson, P.R. Shaver, and L.S. Wrightsman

“Two Dimensions of Self-Esteem: Reciprocal Effects of Positive Self-Worth and Self-Deprecation on Adolescent Problems.” Owens, Timothy J.

“Accentuate the Positive – and the Negative: Rethinking the Use of Self-Esteem, Self-”Deprecation, and Self-Confidence.” Owens, Timothy J.

“Extending Self-Esteem Theory and Research” Owens, Timothy J.

“Society and the Adolescent Self-Image” Rosenberg, Morris

“Conceiving the Self” Rosenberg, Morris

“Self-esteem: Clinical assessment and measurement validation.” Silber, E. and Tippett, Jean

“Self-Esteem: Its Conceptualization and Measurement” Wells, L. Edward and Gerald Marwell

“The Self-Concept” Wylie, Ruth C.

Indeed, it is truly important to develop self-esteem and in this day and age, this can easily be done. If you have the financial means, then you might want to consider taking seminars, however, you can also learn through books and there are various publications. The possibility is just endless and besides, it is never too late to be a better person.

Empower Yourself Through Self Esteem Quotes

icamm — Sat, 03 May 2008 01:07:54 +0000

We are not born with inferiority complex. As a child we never really cared about appeareances or where we place in the social ladder. But as we struck the adolescent phase, when we start comparing ourselves to others, some, even most of us find ourselves feeling inferior. Some never learn to get over it.

Sometimes it’s more than just physical, low self-esteem could also be traced to traumas and other negative feedbacks we get from the community. And this low self-esteem always lead to disastrous consequences. By not getting over it, we in fact prevent ourselves from being truly happy.

There are a number of ways in which to improve our self- esteem. We can go to therapy, take quizzes to help us get to know ourselves more and allow us to move more comfortably in our own skin, there are self-help books. But we can also try reading self-esteem quotes regularly and try to live by it.

Little by little, we will be able to let go of whatever it was the caused us to look at ourselves in a negative way and in turn, we will learn to focus more on who we are as a person and be proud of what we see.

The following are self-esteem qoutes that may prove itself useful in helping us gain more control of our self-esteem:

“I am sure it is one’s duty as a teacher to try to show boys that no opinions, no tastes, no emotions are worth much unless they are one’s own. I suffered acutely as a boy from the lack of being shown this.” : A.C. Benson

“Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.” : Albert Einstein

“No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” : Eleanor Roosevelt

“There is nothing noble about being superior to some other man. The true nobility is in being superior to your previous self.” : Hindu Proverb

“Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are.” : Malcolm Forbes

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” – Buddha

“Every individual has a place to fill in the world, and is important, in some respect, whether he chooses to be so or not.” : Nathaniel Howthorne

“If only you could sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.” : Fred Rogers

“You can do what you have to do, and sometimes you can do it even better than you think you can.” : President Jimmy Carter Jr.

“Never bend your head. Always hold it high. Look the world straight in the face.” : Helen Keller

“Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.” : Peter McIntyre

“Trust yourself, then you will know how to live.” : Johann Wolfgang Van Goethe

“Put all excuses aside and remember this: YOU are capable” : Zig Ziglar

“Self-respect is the fruit of discipline: the sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself.” : Abraham Heschel

“Someone’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality.” : Les Brown

“In my day, we didn’t have self-esteem, we had self-respect, and no more of it than we had earned.” : Jane Haddam

Maximize Your Potential Through Self-Esteem Lessons

icamm — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 14:30:03 +0000

Self-esteem is how you view yourself. Though this may seem as just one of several aspects that make a person human, it is a vital part of the puzzle. You would be surprised how much a healthy or even lack thereof of self-esteem could change the way a person lives his life.

Generally, a person with a healthy self-esteem looks at things in a positive way. He is quick to make decisions and are not afraid to make mistakes. He or she do not look at mistakes as failures at all, in fact, he or she views this as an opportunity to make him or her a better person. There can never be enough room for improvement in a person who has a healthy self-esteem.

Although, self-esteem development starts from the ages one to five, (as this is the stage where human beings are more impressionable) it is never too late to start trying to improve this in you. Just because we never had a happy childhood or if we have been subjected to certain traumas in our younger years, this does not mean that we are destroyed for life. No. We can always choose to take control of our live regardless of age or situation as long as we decide to do it, we can.

Although attending therapy, sessions or seminars are always good to bolster self-esteem, these are not the only ways. If these things involve money which you just do not have enough of, you can always do it at your own time. At your own phase. One of the easiest things to do is stock up on self-esteem qoutes.

Take on that strikes you and concentrate on it. Try to take it to heart and make a resolution to live by it. Take on qoute one a week or once a month and try to live by it. But do not hasten changes. Let it come at its own time. Patience and trust in your ability is the key.

To help you with this, listed below are self-esteem lessons from famous people who have succeeded because they know the importance of self-esteem.

“Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-break on.” : Maxwell Maltz

“The average estimate themselves by what they do, the above average by what they are.” : Johann Friedrich Von Schiller

“The foundation of lasting self-confidence and self esteem is excellence, mastery of your work.” : Brian Tracy

“The man who trims himself to suit everybody will soon whittle himself away.” : Charles Schwab

“The will to do springs from the knowledge that we can do.” : James Allen

“To establish true self-esteem we must concentrate on our successes and forget about the failures and the negatives in our lives.” : Denis Waitley

“Nothing profits more than self-esteem, grounded on what is just and right.” : John Milton

“Outstanding leaders go out of their way to boost the self-esteem of their personnel. If people believe in themselves, it’s amazing what they can accomplish.” : Sam Walton

“Respect yourself if you would have others respect you.” : Baltasar Gracian

“Self-pity gets you nowhere. One must have the adventurous daring to accept oneself as a bundle of possibilities and undertake the most interesting game in the world making the most of one’s best.” : Harry Emerson Fosdick

“Sooner or later, those who win are those who think they can.” : Richard Bach

“Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.” : Albert Einstein

Bolster Girls’ Self-Esteem

icamm — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 21:45:10 +0000

How one succeeds in life depends on several factors, but it has its roots on self-perception. Self-esteem or self-respect is defined as a realistic respect for or favorable impression of oneself. Also considered pride in one’s self.

A person who has a healthy level of self-esteem is one who is characterized by: his or her ability to trust people, is easy to get along with, accepts and gives compliments freely, do not encounter difficulties in expressing his or her feelings and emoitons in positive ways, is not afraid to take reasonable risks, solves and faces problems head on, is independent and is not afraid to make mistakes as they see these to be learning experiences instead of failures, enjoys meeting new people and is focused on the positive outcomes and probabilities more than the negative outcomes.

On the contrary, one who is lacking in self-esteem is someone who mostly procrastinates, gives up easily and are afraid to try new things. They are also not very friendly as they see new people as potential torturers who would trample on what little achievements they may have had.

Self-esteem issues are mostly found in girls. This is because society, over a span of several years have put too much premium on how a girl should look and behave whereas boys are allowed to be themselves. It is only recently that parents and society in general are learning to adapt to new measures which include teaching a person to be comfortable moving in their own skins. By accepting a person for who they are and effectively bringing out the best in them.

There are many ways on how to develop girls’ self-esteem. Sometimes, they do it on their own unconciously. Some feel that better clothes would raise their level of self-esteem. But this is a wrong notion. While clothing or make-up can make one feel good about him or herself for a time. This is not permanent.

If one’s self-esteem is dependent on his or her appearance, then what happens if this goes? They would start feeling bad about themselves. Compare this to someone who is happy about the way he or she is, for exactly the person he or she is. His or her happiness would not be dependent on movable things. They would be happy regardless of what they wear or how they look.

Development of girls’ self-esteem starts from childhood. There are several ways to do this. One way is to help a child feel special. Appreciate them for the little things that they do and never overlook their little achievements. While it is hard to keep focusing on the positive things after a long and grueling day at work, but practice is the key.

If a girl has siblings, by all means, avoid comparisons. This will not only create the unnecessary competitive environment, this may also bring out the worse in the child that cannot do the same things as the child that is set as a bench mark.

Remember to treat each child as an individual and focus on their strengths more than their weaknesses. It is particularly important for girls’ self-esteem to be developed as they are the ones that face more challenges than the boys. For one, they are more susceptible to crimes such as rapes and domestic abuses. With full confidence on their worth as human beings, these crimes can be avoided.

Self-Esteem Clothing

icamm — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 02:30:07 +0000

Self-esteem clothing is a clothing line for ladies in the United States. They mostly trade tops that are sold on consignment to bigger stores such as J.C. Penney’s. They also sell eyewear and foot wear. The style is mostly cool and casual.

There are sizes available from small to plus size women. Recently, the owners figured into some problems from outraged sectors over a t-shirt they have manufactured that says “Property of the Boys’ Locker Room”. Most found it degrading and inhuman to label girls as properties. The outrage caused the owners to pull out their stocks.

The company has their own website which also serves as a community. People are allowed to interact with one another. They also hold contests such as essay writing. The theme is predictably about self-esteem. The contestant is asked to provide tips on how to bolster self-esteem. The winning essay would be published on their website and they will be given shirts that will be delivered directly to the winner.

Self Esteem Clothing sure has a catchy name. It gives one a sense of feeling good about one’s self, mostly one’s physical appearance, when one wears self-esteem clothing’s apparel. As the name suggest, self-esteem pertains to self-image. Or how one perceives him or herself to be. It is also synonymous to confidence. Or how one regards his or herself.

Curiously, people afflicted with self-esteem issues are mostly women. This is so because society puts a high premium on a woman’s physical appearance. While men are allowed to have the just-got-out-of-bed look, complete with bed hair, women are mostly expected to look their best. This is why Self-Esteem Clothing are designed for women.

The style is casual so as to reinforce the idea that self-esteem is all about being comfortable moving in one’s own skin. It is about being happy even in one’s most natural state. It is about dressing down and having enough confidence in one’s personality to not rely on loud clothes just to be noticed.

For, indeed, true self-esteem is not dependent on external factors such as clothes or make-up, self-esteem is dependent on how one perceives him or herself to be. It is personal. It is about behaviour and a person’s state of mind.

Teens mostly suffer from self-esteem issues as appearance tend to matter most at this stage. Peer acceptance is mostly dependent on one’s physical appearance, sad as it may sound. But there are ways on how to deal with this. While it is always tricky to deal with teenagers as it is mostly during this time that people are caught in the middle of being a child and being an adult, the key to bolstering self-esteem is constant support from a teen’s parent.

It is never too late to focus on a person’s positive traits and trusting a child, teen or adult to make their own decisions. I guess, when it all comes down to it, a person’s level of self-esteem depends on how much trusted they feel.

Self confidence and trust go hand in hand. While clothing can help a person feel good about him or herself, these are not all there is to self-esteem. If a person’s self-esteem depends on the clothes they wear, then what happens when they take these off? What remains would be a sad, hallow soul. For truly, more than clothing, self-esteem is really all about trusting one’s self and loving one’s self just the way they are.

Fun Self-Esteem Activities

icamm — Fri, 15 Feb 2008 15:44:56 +0000

Self-esteem is how one views himself or herself, either positively or negatively. A person who has a healthy self-esteem is one who views things in a positive way. Although development of self-esteem should generally start from childhood, it is never too late to correct past mistakes and try to develop this in adulthood.

There are many ways through which self-esteem can be raised. One can either opt to go to a seminar or seek professional help, one can opt to read books on self-esteem as there are various. Or one can get involved in self-esteem activities. There are a lot of activities and below are two which can help bolster self-esteem:

A. Brochure About Me

The objective of this activity is to bolster participants’ self-esteem and to encourage them to give and receive positive feedback. This self-esteem activity is ideal for groups of four to twenty-five. Materials needed are a sheet of paper, box of markers or crayons and one paper clip per participant.

The paper to use should be colored. This is to be folded into three segments, just like a tri-fold brochure. On the front flap, ask the participants to write down their names. They can write it any way they want. Ask them to be creative. When they are done with this, on the inside of the brochure, ask them to write down specific categories which they are to fill up.

The categories should be anything that would make them notice positive things about themselves. These questions can be Things I’m good at, or My special talents, or Things I like about myself, My greatest achievement, what makes me happy, and so on.

Encourage them to feel free to write anything they want and assure them that no one will read what is written inside the brochure but them. When they are done writing, have them fold the brochure and paper clip it shut.

Next, ask the participants to pass their brochure to the person beside them. The recipient would then write down positive things about the person who owns the brochure. If the recipient does not know well the person from whom the brochure belongs to, he or she may opt to say general things such as “I think you have great eyes.”

The goal is for everyone to put in a comment. Continue doing this until everyone has written on the brochures. It would be best to have the participants sit in a circle so it would be easier to monitor the activity.

After this, give the participants about five minutes to read their brochures. Then discuss how they felt about the activity. How they felt about receiving and giving compliments. The participants may keep their brochures so they can go over it again if they are having a bad day.

B. Special Candy Game

The objective of the game is to help participants find positive things about themselves and also to find things they have in common with other people. This game is ideal for groups of five to fifteen.

Have the participants sit in a circle, then give each one of them ten candies. Go around the circle and point to a person and ask him or her to name one positive trait that he or she has. Anyone among the group who does not have the same ability will throw one candy at that person. The idea is to ensure that the participants have the same if not almost the same number of candies.

Building Self Esteem On Your Offspring

icamm — Mon, 14 Jan 2008 16:14:56 +0000

Parents choose to shield their children from the harsh reality of the world because they fear that a single mistake could ruin their kids’ lives. However, if you are a parent and you truly want to arm your child with the right skills and knowledge to be able to get through life’s challenges in one piece, you have to learn to let go and and allow your children to make mistakes and learn on their own.

Spoonfeeding your kid will work probably for the first four years, but, eventually, your child will develop an identity of his own and start exploring independently. Keeping a watchful and hawl-like attention on him will only stifle his personal and emotional growth and disallow him from becoming the person he is meant to be.

A child that constantly hides under his mother’s skirt is not likely to succeed in life any more than the child that has learned to ask questions and say ‘no’ early on. This doesn’t mean you have to breed a defiant brat, though. What is meant here is that your child should be self confident enough to stand on his own two feet and stop depending on you for every activity and to solve every problem.

One of the things you can do to make sure that when the time comes that your offspring has to go out and face the world is to build his self esteem early in life. You can do this by allowing him to wander around the house and do things by himself. If you keep handing things to him and doing him favors, chances are, he won’t be able to learn and will always depend on you for everything. This is cute when he’s still young. But when he gets older and he’s still dependent on you, it isn’t healthy anymore.

This doesn’t mean, of course, that you should just let him go and hurt himself. You still have to stay in the sidelines and watch him, while keeping a good distance, to make sure he doesn’t stray from his path. Remember that you should leave him to explore what he wants and develop what he’s interested in. Do not force your ideas on your offspring. Doing so would eventually breed a rebel.

Building your offspring’s self esteem means teaching him self confidence : letting him believe that he can achieve anything he puts him mind and heart into. A child with low self esteem will buckle and run at the sight of responsibility. A child armed with self esteem will tackle challenges head-on even if he is faced with difficulty. Challenges are what help a child thrive and survive in this world. Without problems, nobody will be able to appreciate victory.

It is understandable that you want only the best for your child. In fact, it wouldn’t a surprise if you dream that his life will be a lot better than yours. However, hiding him from the rest of the world will not do him any good. Teach him to go out and make mistakes. Tell him that it’s okay to fail sometimes, because there’s always a silver lining behind every dark cloud. You offspring’s self esteem is his best defense against the world today. While you will not be able to protect him forever, you can make sure he can cope beautifully if you arm him with self esteem.

Low Self-Esteem Does Not Linger

icamm — Tue, 25 Dec 2007 20:57:29 +0000

Self-esteem is very important in a person’s life. It decides what an individual would do or how would they perform. Self-esteem literally means how a person looks at himself or herself. A person with a high self-esteem may be very successful in life. Those who have a high self-esteem trust their own selves so that they can get the job done. However, not all people trust themselves and their capabilities. These people have low self-esteem.

You may not notice it but low self-esteem will eventually take its toll on you. If you have low self-esteem, you are bound to get more easily noticed. If you are not quite sure, then let the following descriptions enlighten you.

Usually, you perceive of yourself as someone who is quiet and shy for most of the time, sometimes to the point that you think of yourself as the lowest of the low. You do not believe in your talents or on the things that you can do, and you just stay quiet even though you know, in your heart of hearts, that you can do it. If these things happen to you then something in you questions your capability to perform certain tasks because you feel like you lack the confidence to push it through.

Low self-esteem actually controls and holds you down. It prevents you from doing something that you can actually perform successully. It also prevents you from achieving something great. Low self-esteem must be abolished from every person’s mentality so that everyone can perform his or her best with his or her abilities.

When you were born, you were not born with low self-esteem. It is not innate. It gets developed through hardships and trials. Some events may lead to your losing your confidence. These said events are most usually traumatic and it sticks inside your head, which is the reason why you tend to lose your self-esteem little by little, sometimes, even as a whole.

Instances like you get humiliated in public, or you made a wrong decision, in some point of your life, that cost you something that was precious or very significant to you. Another possible situation would be that, something happened in your childhood and it made you lose your self-esteem. Basically, everyone does not have low self-esteem at birth, nor a high one at that matter, but everyone has a self-esteem that is of medial rate, and it is only your experiences that determine whether you will be having a high one or a low one.

Once your self-esteem is lost, does that conclude that you are never ever going to have high self-esteem again? The answer is no. You can actually regain it. If you have a low self-esteem because of previous bad experiences, one thing to conquer this problem is to face that certain bad experience and turn it into a good one.

You must make that bad thing into something that is more productive. In that way, every time you encounter that experience, or any other event that is closely related to the aforementioned, what you will remember from it is the good thing and not the bad feeling you got.

You must always keep in mind that you should protect your self-esteem. It is important for the people around you, but more important for your own welfare. You must also remember to teach your children the values and abilities in order for them to be able to conserve their self-esteem. You should instill in them confidence to face each day with their heads up high, because a low self-esteem or lack of confidence will determine what kind of a person they will be.

Low self-esteem will hold people down from showing their real potential. Remember, if you have a low self-esteem, you should try, as much as possible, to overcome it in the quickest time. You may never know what you can do if only you have the confidence.

Tips On Developing Self-Esteem

icamm — Thu, 13 Dec 2007 22:44:49 +0000

Lack of self-esteem can be a debilitating problem. It actually hampers one’s potential to be successful or even achieving one’s dreams or in some cases, even hampers the ability to dream big. People with low self-worth often get into self-destructive relationships with self and others. There are many reasons why people lose their self-esteem.

Mostly, this is caused by external factors such as society and our family relations or the manner we were brought up. The media also plays a vital role in developing self-esteem as it still has the capacity to provide the greatest influence on people.

Each one of us is exposed to media and these advertisements (such as commercials, billboards, ads, etc) often cram our minds with what beauty and therefore acceptance is all about. We tend to compare ourselves to their bench mark of what is acceptable to society and if we feel we do not meet up to these criterias, we feel bad about ourselves. Then we get self-esteem issues.

As a child, we never really cared about what is and is not acceptable to society. We say what we want to say, do what we want to do, dress up with whatever clothes we choose to dress ourselves up in and look the way we want to look. It did not matter to us then what shapes our noses have, what color our skins are, whether we are thin or not.

In other words, we created our own society. We never really cared about what people think. But somehow, as we grow older, we learn to seek acceptance and even approval from the people that surround us. If we do not get this approval, then our issues with self-esteem starts.

Self-esteem development starts from childhood. It is a parent’s duty to make his or her child feel special. And contrary to scolding the child for doing something wrong, it would help if we engage him or her in the task of solving their own problems. Do not merely tell them what to do, help them decide on what they think is best for them. This helps the child cultivate a sense of responsibility and control over his life. These traits are essential in developing self-esteem.

A parent should also concentrate on the positive traits of his or her child. It is given that every one of us has our own good and bad sides, but focusing on the positive will encourage the child to bring out that trait more often if he or she sees that it is well appreciated. This practice can also be applied to adults. Focus on their good traits and in time, they will learn to bring that out more often.

Also, one of the things a parent should remember is to never, never compare siblings. Treat each child as an individual and focus on their strengths. Comparing siblings to one another will only succeed in bringing out the best in one child and the worst in the other. If the other sibling feels that he or she cannot match the “better” sibling, eventually he or she will give up and start being contented being the “lesser” sibling.

Lastly, train the child to love him or herself by making him or her feel loved. Avoid judging him or her for their mistakes, instead, ask them what they could do differently in the future to avoid it. This will give them the feeling that they are trusted. The more a child feels trusted, the higher his or her regard for his or herself will be.

Tips On Building Your Child’s Self Esteem

icamm — Sat, 01 Dec 2007 01:00:05 +0000

To be able to breed children who are ready to tackle any challenges in life and see failure as merely a stepping stone than a hindrance, it is our responsibility as parents to instill in them the values of independence, self reliance, confidence and self esteem.

Children who are independent are able to think for themselves, instead of looking to us and waiting for answers for every little thing that happens, whether positive or negative. Our kids should be able to work out problems by themselves at an early age, otherwise, they will end up as adults who simply stay on the sidelines and watch the world go by unnoticed.

Building our children’s self esteem is probably one of the best gifts we can give them early in life. If we teach our children to be self reliant and to believe in their ability to achieve things, then wouldn’t become too worried when they eventually grow up, because we are confident that they will make well calculated decisions.

The world we live in today is filled with violence. Whether we like it or not, we cannot forever shield our kids from this kind of environment. At one point, we will have to let go and let them wander off and develop personalities of their own. Stifling this growth by keeping our children under very close watch would be a disservice to them. Remember, we don’t own our kids. They are not our puppets. They have unique abilities and personalities that need to be developed and honed.

Encourage them to go for their dreams.

Most parents discourage their kids to go for big dreams for fear that the challenges along the way and the failures will only bring hurt and disappointment. This is wrong. Parents should encourage their children to go for anything they set their minds and hearts into, because failure is an inevitable part of life. It is through failure that we learn. It is through failure that we figure out how to more effectively deal with the next challenge that comes along.

Set your kids free

You can’t forever make decisions for your children. You have to let them grow at their own pace and at their own time. If their choices are different from what you would have wanted for them, let them be. Your responsibility is to watch from the sidelines and ensure that they don’t stray from the path they chose, not to control their every move. If they make mistakes, fine. Instead of fixing their problems for them, teach them to pick themselves up and try once more.

Believe in your children

If you don’t show your kids that you believe in their ability to achieve their dreams, then it isn’t likely that they will be able to accomplish anything. Remember, our children often look to us for guidance and support, even when they already become adults. Our acceptance and encouragement is vital. If you don’t believe, neither will they.

Show them you care.

Even if our children make mistakes, we should always show them that we are there to support them every step of the way. Sure, our kids do not and will not always make the best decisions. And we will see them cry when they fail. In order to help them regain the strength to fight again, we should show them that failing is natural to human life and that we, as parents, are always there to help them get back on track. Nobody is perfect. Not our children. Not even us.

As parents, we can only do so much for our children to prepare them for the life ahead of them. We cannot and should not hold onto them forever. Each of our kids are unique individuals who each have their own purpose in this world. Let them grow and flourish.